I have been thinking about the many different filters I have seen the world in....my world in. I have definitely changed filters over the years. I suppose we all have. From a child's impression, innocent and believing to an adult not so seasoned, but seasoned enough. With life's satisfactions and disappointments, with its way of teaching you to dream then teaching to grieve and if resilient dream again. I'm wondering if my filter has any more dreams. I'm wondering if the allure of life will ever have the power to sweep me off my feet again....to take my run away thoughts to places I can't wait to hold on to, step into...feel alive through. I'm not who I was when I was 12, 24, or even 34....is anyone ever?
When I was 12 I would lay in the grass and wait for a cloud, and 24 I looked to the person beside me and wonder what life we would make, and 34 I sank comfortably in the sofa of my satisfaction. Now, I feel there are days I could drown in disappointment. I have made a promise to tread... to keep my head above the water and wait for my raft whether it comes in resilience or even a rest I welcome.
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Hi :) Not sure if you're wanting or expecting feedback, but it sounds to me that "Hope" is the topic of this post. You know, Emily Dickinson wrote:
"Hope" is the thing with feathers -
That perches in the soul -
And sings the tune without words -
And never stops - at all...
I don't know if you've kept up with stuff going on in my life but I've been doing a lot of soul searching over the last 6 months or so. Hopeless would be a good word for me when I started. I was sure nothing could save me. Today, I know that no one is without hope. Indeed, the best hope is the very admission of hopelessness. There may seem little chance of realizing my hopes but, far from killing them, that dim prospect gives them new life. I once thought that if I hoped for something I had to pursue it frantically. That, I now know is not the way. Going about my business, doing one small necessary chore at a time, and letting God take care of the rest...that is the way. I live one day at a time and when I feel hopeless, I admit I can do very little about my fears, my concerns and my hopes. But I can, and do, simply turn them over to God.
*hugs* - Kel
this is almost poetic and perfectly honest...I admire honesty.
also - I blogged and it's pretty awesome.
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